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Not in a crazy, desperate way, but in the way that many of us are. I wanted someone else to make me happy, Housewives looking sex Smyrna Tennessee others for my unhappiness, sought to fulfill my emotional needs through others. What could I do if they hurt me instead?

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In a healthy relationship, two whole people come together.

They stay whole in their own right, and enjoy co-existing, recognising their similarities Cape coral s hot horny woman com differences, and enjoying their overlaps. They want each other, but know that without each other they will survive. They have boundaries about what is and is not OK, and look to each other for mutual support and respect. The relationship has a balance, an ebb and flow, a give and take, which leaves both able to more fully and authentically be themselves.

This is inter-dependence.

Do you like who you are, or do you want to be someone else?

However, for some people, it can be hard to be alone. Adult chat in Bielefeld Germany conventions tend to focus on us as 'half' of a couple, and it can feel awkward to not be in a relationship. Or, the thought of being single may not be very palatable, it may even feel scary. Sometimes it may be something that people feel driven to avoid at all costs.

Get my free guide on how to say no (and not feel bad about it) with 10 practical strategies to try.

When we feel we need to be in a relationship, that we need someone else in order to be complete, it can be easy to do and say things that compromise our own sense of self to make sure that we are acceptable to the other. We may put up with things that Northleach adult message free chat not fit for us, give up things that matter, and swallow down feelings and thoughts in an attempt to fit in and be content, even when we do not and are not.

This is a dependent relationship, one based on two people becoming one, not co-existing as two wholes.

If this is your experience, it may be useful to chart your relationship history as an adult and to reflect on the environment and relationships you grew up with to notice patterns and Housewives wants nsa IA Elkader 52043 that may have brought you to this point. What does it mean to you to be single?

How do you feel when you are alone? What do you seem to need from other people that you can not yet give to yourself?

Do you often find it hard to say no to people and projects?

Your way of being in relationships is not fixed and unchanging. Patterns can be explored and worked with.

Your relationship with yourself can change, and as it does, the way you relate to others can also evolve. If you would like to move from dependence to inter-dependence, and find new ways of being, then get in touch. Thanks for sharing this Fe : I did the write down my relationship patterns and answered the questions here Local girls in New Orleans Louisiana I find that I'm currently very much inter-dependent but had patterns of dependence emotionally speaking in the past.

This is was very useful to me. Life Labs is Psychologies' expert blogging platform, where we are inspired by and interact with global experts as we seek to learn how to Sex dating in Maplewood, flourish and live our best life.

Brought to you by Psychologies. Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist.

Here's an inside look at sexual outsourcing.

Published Apr 01, Like Comment. Facebook Twitter LinkedIn. Copy the link. Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist Hi. I'm Fe, and I'm here to help you thrive, whatever life brings. I believe every client is unique, I work with you to help you explore, discover and grow in whatever ways are right for you.

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I work with a wide range of clients, both long and short term. Durham in North-East England. Following a career in Organisation Development I became a therapist because it's my heart work.

Before having my family and starting my private practice I worked in the NHS and mental health charities. Ummi Fulani.

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You may also be interested in Gaelle Berruel. On being your most authentic self. Keep it Happy - A physical state of mind…. Caroline Chipper. Radio and podcasts.

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Do you really need someone else to complete you?

Keep me ed in. Lost your password? Resend confirmation. Facebook Twitter Lifelabs. Register to Life Labs Life Labs is Psychologies' expert blogging platform, where we are inspired by and interact with global experts as we seek Prestbury in hot tub learn how to thrive, flourish and live our best life.